Do Eit: Crochet Tank Top

DO EIT
Crochet Tank Top
%100 Wool

My mantra for this year has been Do Eiitt. There are so many things I always tell myself I want to do, but somehow never get around to doing them. Whether it is from doubting my own capabilities and strengths, being held back by fear or being told I can't, sometimes I find myself lacking the confidence to act on the things I decide are of value to me.

It has always been along lived fantasy of mine to have a head of purple hair. When I cut my locs off all I longed for was to have a bald purple head. Wavering in confidence about acting on the idea, I remember speaking with a good friend of mine looking for some consultation on the matter. I found I was discouraged. I was told that "it wouldn't suit my complexion" and when I asked why I was told that "it would look better on someone who was lighter skinned." Hum. For a while I truly believed the misplaced judgment of my friend because they are someone I trust. Despite so desperately longing to have a bald purple head, for months I walked around with the idea that I was too dark to rock it. Too dark...I thought about that for a long time, how could I be too dark to do something? I also wondered, how could I let someone else perspectives, values, and beliefs shape and subdue my own?

I made this crochet tank top because I saw a shirt just like it that I couldn't afford, but being held back my financial restrictions most def wasn't gonna stop me. I told myself "I can make that, so do eit!" It took a while to get it just right, required starting over, many hours and a lot of trust in my crochet abilities and imagination, but finally I came out with a project I am really proud of! And just like my (now) purple bald head, having the confidence to act on what I decide to do is a part of honoring my mantra.

Whether it is because I choose not to shave my armpits, choose to cut off my locs, have purple hair, live a budgeted lifestyle, my choice of clothes or whatever, I decided that I wouldn't allow people to police me, my body or values. Hence Do Eiitt. Sometimes it is scary to act on the things we truly want and believe in for ourselves for a number of reasons: there may be a threat of violence in our lives, we may lose friends or loved ones, fear of the unknown, regret and so on. What I have learned on this journey so far is that working towards fostering trust in ourselves and having people who support us goes a long way in helping us to be who and how we want to be. Be brave, be you!

Breathe. Remember you can do eit!

Smiles :)

Tuly Maimouna

R&S: Small waist, Big booty, Thick thighs

Thick Thigh Problems

I just learned that there is this thing, that's become a thing. Leg gap? Whats that all about? My thighs rub together. In fact, in the summer it creates so much friction that I sweat. I have to make sure to put baby power between my thighs as a precautionary measure. HAHA! No joke...They rub together so much that when I wear pants they turn into a ripped up disaster!

When I was I young and naive I was all about Apple Bottom jeans. They hugged my body in all the right spots! They came at a serious cost to my wallet and ripped at the crotch anyway, but at least they fit. Now I am not even about that life anymore, buying grossly over priced clothing no longer makes sense in my mind or cents to my wallet. So when I started buying cheaper jeans not only did they rip in the crotch, but I had to start buying pants a size bigger because what fits my thighs and booty definitely can not fit my waist. Nothing fit right and I started to think 'Ughh if only my booty wasn't so phat and I lost a little more weight this would look really cute!' Instead of asking 'who were they making this for and who actually fits into this?' I started blaming my own body for something I had no hand in designing. It never crossed my mind that manufactures have a hand at deciding who can wear what and who should fit into what. Looking good started to feel like a luxury, available to me only when I could afford it.

But this is not something that I face everyday, and I would like to acknowledge that. Being able to go into a store and at least find something that fits at a reasonable price is a privilege I had never considered before. This is an issue that is not just particular to body shape, but anyone who's body doesn't fit a standardized norm. Whether it is someone who is fluffy, voluptuous, tall, short, differently shaped, has fewer or more limbs or whatever. We all deserve to look as fabulous as we choose to or choose not to. Choice being the key word here. It is interesting to me how isms have mutated. They have managed to weave themselves into the fabric of everyday life masking them selves as a standardized norm to the point where they are nearly invisible! Just because they no longer exist in their original form, does not at all suggest that they no longer exist! So what did I decide to do? Recycle and save of course! I am soooo over always throwing away my jeans cause the inner thigh ripped, or always having to wear a belt so my booty crack doesn't show then getting that awkward bunched up material at the front. Or looking dumpy and wearing clothes I don't want to wear simply cause I can't afford the ones I actually want. I think learning to sew is an excellent way to resisting the limited bullshit presented to us as consumers, it is also a simple way of challenging industry norms that exclude certain people from wearing certain clothes.

Materials

How to take in jeans at the waist, really helped me in figuring out how to make darts. It is super easy and you can take in as much or as little as you want when trying to get perfectly hip hugging pants! 

Pulling in the Waist of Pants

Making A Dart

I decided to use scrap fabric and sew two patches on the inside of my jeans to cover up the hole created by my rubbing thighs. I like the rips, they tell a reoccurring life story (the first picture at the very top shows how they look flipped right-side out).

Ripped Crotch 'Band-Aid'

Sure clothing designers can make looking good inaccessible for a number of reasons, but that doesn't mean that we can't and shouldn't look good. Why should we rely on them anyway? And why should we try to change our bodies to fit an industry standard? So let your jelly roll, thighs rub, clap your three hands, strut your long ass legs, move your body how ever you can! As people who live outside the box, lets keep up the creativity, keep surviving, and keep resisting all while looking absolutely fabulous doing so!

To quote Jason a character from one of my favorite shows Home Movies 'Am I regular? Because my pants say irregular...' 

Smiles :)

Tuly Maimouna

R&S: The Sexy Shero!

Before...

I hate short dresses. To each our own, but I just don't get it y'all! Whenever I walk the dress rides up so high my booty is all kinds of out. Even when my legs are closed there is this insistent gap between the dress and my legs, where no matter how hard I try my underwear (or crotch) always manages to show. And since I don't shave I am greeted by turned up noses and frowning faces at my hairy parts. In my experience, mini dresses have shown me no love. I just don't feel sexy in them despite how hard I have tried to convince myself in the past. I could just shake a rage fist and curse the mini dresses' ambivalence towards my feelings, or go Shero!

I bought this red mini dress about four years ago and took it around the track twice. Both times I wore it I was absolutely mortified! I felt so self conscious and hideous that I had a hard time actually enjoying myself. Why did I buy it? Well, because I thought that this is what I had to do to be 'sexy', but why did being 'sexy' feel so bad? And despite my distaste towards this dress I just couldn't bring myself throw it away, why? Because I am a crafty hoar[der] that's why. So this hate-hate relationship carried on for years where this dress that I swore to never wear again sat in my closet waiting, inevitably, in vain. Until the other day! After a contemplative face off with this dress, I decided that I really wanted to make it into something that I would actually wear! So after bit of altering and some shoddy work on the sewing machine this is what I came up with! A jumper fit for a Shero!

AFTER!

If anything I have learned that while I am still a horader, recycling and saving has also provided me with the opportunity to make things that are better suited to my bootylicious body and has enabled me to take charge of my own sexiness instead of trying to fit my body into what really doesn't work for me. Like a Shero I save myself from unnecessarily feeling like a hot heap of dog mess.

Yeah, I totally transform into a bootylicious crafty hoar supershero after dark.

Smiles :)

Tuly Maimouna

p.s. I would post the how-to for this, but I am so embarrassed of my tailoring skills that I wouldn't dare. They are far from impressive, and are just good enough to get the job done.

Sexploration: Tantalizing Titties! Crochet Pasties for Areola of Colour!



Tantalizing Titties
Crochet Pasties
$15.00

I have been on this interesting personal journey for a while. I am currently in the midst of trying to expand my sexual possibilities and figuring out what that even means. I initially thought that this journey was only about exploring and finding a personal definition of what sex is, but after having some really insightful conversations in some really...interesting locations I have come to find that so many other aspect of myself are tied into this three letter word.

Prior to taking the first few steps of this journey I had to first sit down and seriously think about what my boundaries are and what I need to say and do in order to keep things safe, consensual and above all sexy. As many things it has been an amazing up and down learning experience.Thus far I have learned that my boundaries aren't static, they shift and really do depend on context; like how I am feeling that day, who the person(s) involved are, or where I am and these different variables influence how I navigate my exploration from one experience to another.

So as a part of this sexual exploration I am now calling sexploration my girl who has whole heartedly supported many of my wild ideas, together we will be venturing into the unknown to check this fetish party and the first thing she asked me was 'ooooh my gosh girl, what are we wearing?!' Now I dunno about y'all, but I think that whether you are going to a wedding or a fetish party what you wear is a question that must always be answered, and your answer must be delivered in the most fly way possible!....but how? 

A few days ago another friend of mine was really excited to show me these nipple pasties that her friend had bought for her. They were really dope, but there was one problem...they were made for white peoples breasts. I am not  saying that there is anything wrong with white people breasts, in fact I think all breasts equally rule! But just like clothes that don't fit right I am not going to wear something that wasn't made for me or made to suit my body. So we resolved to make our very own sexy pasties for areola of colour! I decided to call them tantalizing tittes because I think mine are just that! I always tell people that I want my titties to look as tantalizing as possible, and lets be honest here whose wouldn't be when adorned with crochet goodness, and golden nipple piercings with chain tassels?

Sexploration for me is keeping an informed and open mind in finding out what works for me, and what I wear (or don't) is a reflection of just that. So I'll flaunting my sexy, big and brown areola in my own fashion.

shake your big brown areola, cause they tantalizing too!

Smiles :)

Tuly Maimouna